Butterflies

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Butterflies (Listening Suggestion: Pretty Wings by Maxwell)

I close my eyes and remember the blood rushing to my face the very first time you gave me butterflies. The words of your text brushed against a guarded a heart, the movement of emotions swept me by surprise.

When the phone rings and I see your name, a smile regardless of hurt cracks my lips. All I can feel is the distant memory of you between my hips.

I shouldn’t think about you when I wake, sweet cannabis on my lips poetically placed. You answered questions before they were ever asked. My very own Prince Charming finally unmasked…

A lifetime of hopeful dreams, run through in a matter of weeks, every dream I thought I was finally living fell in tears running down my cheeks.

Every song we shared, every video call we made and every smile on your face, gave me butterflies & I knew it would take me to some amazing unfathomable place.

I didn’t expect for you to walk in the door and tell me you felt like you were driving home – and after such a perfect weekend I had no idea I’d be writing a heart-broken poem.

I know I’m not crazy for feeling the way I do, the vulnerability inside my heart I opened up to you.

The laughter in your voice, the conversations we shared…Every beat that dropped exposed tiny pieces of my soul I thought would be handled with care.

“It’s me, not you.” Had me feeling like the biggest fool.

At first I was hurt, the emotions turned me mad, but as each day passes, the imperfectly perfect you just makes me sad.

Two souls don’t connect just to disconnect and move on untouched, my heart guarded once again, simply clutched.

I wanted to be your weakness, I wanted to change your world. I wanted nothing more than to be your girl.

Maybe I’ma dreamer, but I’m still a Queen and if my love is like a river, it’s running right through you, and every fiber of your being.

I know you just wanted to chill, but you wrapped me with your loving embrace the very first moment you saw my face.

I will love you anyway, even if you cannot stay…But don’t let me be the one that got away.

Every Isley Brother’s record that plays that I miss dancing with you, makes me want to ask you, “What you gonna do?”

Every turn I make there’s a reminder of the place you once stood, little holes of emptiness you started to fill, so good.

The songs we shared make me turn the music down, wondering when you’re going to make me smile and erase this frown.

But I suppose it’s indubious poetry, that I just spread my pretty wings and fly away with fury.

For every smile you added to my face, there will always be room for butterflies in my heart, a secretly guarded empty place.